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I am tired of life...?

People are picking on me everyday at school, specially teachers! They're making me nervous with telling that I got no future and things like that.. When I reach home I am usually attacking my parents because of this, even if I don't want to. When I was small, I had a friend, ( so that means I have no friends in real life now ), but he decided to tear a piece of my heart , I mean he got new friends and he doesn't want to be friend with me anymore. Oh.. I don't find even internet friends from my own country, I've tried to do this for years, but then I discovered a place like Yahoo ! Answers and I got some friends from here. At history lessons I am tired to hear how bad USA is and that Americans are the worst nation ever ( I am usually quiet, because I don't feel like arguing, I lose anyway, whole class is always on teacher's side) and teacher is always telling that black and white people suck and asians are the best, these things are annoying me so much. Also I am bad at chemistry,maths and I am already taking after classes for many years, but I still crawl, I am just bad at school ( For example, we had a test in English , I gave my best I got B... don't tell me that it's good, it's not , I got B , I tried to get A ). Usually I am thinking to those celebrities who were doing bad in school too, they're like kinda supporting me, even when I've never talked to them, but still they're like telling me no matter how hard life is, crawl even when it's really hard and later you'll stand up. In school people sometimes tell me that I am ugly. Once I fell in love with one girl and I thought I'll get over her , but I didn't so I told it to her.. She told me that nobody wants to date a freak like me and my children will become freak too, then some years later I had a girlfriend who dumped me for being too caring... Now I am having a girlfriend (which is long distance relationship), but I am so afraid I'll lose her... but anyways why's every girl turned on bad guys? I see at school how guys are hitting them and treating bad, even don't care about their feelings, calling them with b-word and they have many girls around them. Actually my biggest problem is I wanna become a rapper/or a singer and I wanna make at least 1 movie in my life, so I could be the biggest serial killer in whole world, but the difference is I kill them in my songs, but they're picking on me because of my voice... and that makes me more mad, once I sent by accidentally my lyrics to my classmate and like all my lyrics are about that how much I hate this world and how much I wanna die, so now everybody's calling me 'emo' at school.. All I wanted to ask from you actually was that is that possible they burn down bridge what brings me into future ? Because I can't swim and I'll fall in lava anyway... Should I hold on my dreams, is that possible they will come true no matter what other people think about me? ( English isn't my first language ). Please tell me.

Public Comments

1. things will get better as long as ur nice to people
2. believe in yourself and don't let people bring you down. take what they say as a sort of encouragement... like if someone says "you can't do it" prove them wrong. do it. good luck!
3. Sounds like you need an outlet. You know, somthing to vent your feelings. A sport would be good, but try something which will help you in everyday life. Kick boxing? Or maybe just go to the gym a bit, maybe get a punch bag. It may seem trivial and stupid at first but after a while its gonna help you stick up for yourself, so you dont have to take shit from people. Obviously Im not saying hit teachers lol, but if anyone gives you shit you can tell them where to go without being scared. Everyone has their rough stages, but once you get through it, its all good