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People Please Answer! Why do some people put marriage & having children first on their list instead?

of trying to have a Good Paying Career & Nice Big Home to raise a family? Why do people do this backwards? I work with plenty of people that work pay check to pay check, just trying to make ends meat to raise a family.I just wonder do most people underestimate how expensive & time consuming it is to raise a family?

Public Comments

1. A good paying career is important to raise a family, however a BIG home isn't . Money and Materilistic things shouldn't be a priority..Love is.
2. Probably because it's more important to them that they have a family than a good income.
3. Kids in a rush to grow up thinking it will be all fun and games. Life is hard without a college education. There is no better feeling than getting your degree, a great job and buying a home by yourself. This way you know you can always fall back on your own two feet. Most girls have a final goal of getting married instead of working on themselves first. It's sad.
4. Some peopple dont plan, have babies in order to recieive benefits (talking about UK) or are just desperate to have a family right away. Some people just are not career motivated. I do think its a bit mad to have kids when you cant afford to though.
5. because some people like to do things backwards. that is why my boys will be doing exactly what your question spelled out.
6. why? because aa good nice paying career comes AFTER education and hard work because the easier part of getting into relationships that result in children takes less effort. so young people tend to simply "fall" into the easier path to take.
7. That's a good question. For some reason, a number of people have the "American Dream" drummed into their heads from someone - the media, parents, etc. They are like robots, plodding toward that goal from the time they are 18, never mind the consequences of a lost education, not having financial resources to support a family, a partner who is not a good match for them, etc. On the other hand, there is no "perfect" time to get married or have kids. That is at the other end of the spectrum from the people described above. If you wait until everything is perfect you will probably marry late or never, and never have the joy of kids. So I guess the secret is finding the happy medium between the two.
8. different reason for each person Im sure having a good career or job and a big home dont really matter when it comes to either. Although you need to have an income to live any type of standard of a good life, you dont necessarily need those things to be loving and support in a family setting....if we all waited until we had th ultimate career or the mega house we would never have kids or get married because you will never make enough money compared to how much it actually cost to raise a child and you cant make a house a home without love no matter how big it is.
9. Having lots of money and lots of THINGS is not satisfying like having a loving family, raising kids, living paycheck to paycheck teaches you what life is really about, you learn so much, you mature more I could go on forever. Family time is the best times in the world, I would never trade my husband and baby boy for money and career etc.. Its a challenge but its all so worth it!
10. Well, I am a stay at home mom and quit college to do so. We wanted a family. We refuse to pay someone else to do what we wanted to do, have kids and raise them. For what, so I can work at a good paying career that will pay for mostly daycare? Kids are a full time job and the most rewarding. So, we put one of our careers on hold so we could do what we wanted. And we aren't missing out on a thing. Who cares that i don't have a huge house, less cleaning more playing! Kids don't need every new electronic and thirty different outfits and a room filled to the max with toys they don't play with. Money cannot buy everything.
11. Yes, I think they understand and chose a family anyway.
12. Why go to college and get a good paying job when you can start having a bunch of kids with multiple men, collect child support, collect food stamps, have utilities covered through the welfare utlity program, move into a house by qualifing for section 8, receive free childcare (vouchers), ect. The more kids you have, the better your life will be...right?! This society is a** backwards.
13. You see life is not what you see is systematic or in order as what you think. Doesn't matter you marriage come first or later you still have work hard to achieve what you want in life.
14. Well, for one, not going to college is not backwards. Some people just are not meant for college. Two- you can have a great fulfilling job, without a college education. -My husband does. Three- life isn't about money, houses, and materialistic things. Some people want a house full of kids and a good spouse by their sides.