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Would all of you in the adoption section only have coffee with those members who agree with your view?

Just curious as I didn't see any real pro adoption people listed, ie those that don't think infant adoption is bad. And what about you Pro adopters, any of you willing to have coffee with any of them?

Public Comments

  1. I'm not about to have coffee with anyone I meet on the internet. Sorry.
  2. I have already met with people who don't agree with me on everything. That's the part of the "real life" outside YA! So no. I wouldn't just meet with people I agree with. I think our answers in Tish's question speak for themselves. We ALL said we would agree to have coffee with those in the other "camp" so to speak. ETA: However...I wouldn't meet with anyone who blocks others because they didn't like a response (but feels free to email others before blocking). Or anyone who verbally attacks on here. This is ENTIRELY different than disagreeing as many of us disagree but with some degree of civility.
  3. Well, even with newborn adopters, like myself, we know it isn't always good. In fact, if you consider both birthmom and adoptee feelings later in life, I would think its less than half that have an all around good feeling about the adoption. Most of us think there is some type of major reforms that need to be done. Unbiased counseling for the mother, limits on "birthmother expenses", open records, enforceable open adoption, federal caps on agency fee's..the list goes on. I would love to have coffee with a lot of these people on the board. Think of all the ideas that could come out of unhappy birth parents and adoptee's meeting with adoptive parents and preadoptive parents! To bad we never can seem to work together for change. I call for a giant coffee meeting in DC to unite and express out views to the government!
  4. I don't drink coffee..... Love Few, Hate Many, Trust No One...
  5. If I had to choose to have coffee with someone from the adoption section, I would choose H****** simply because she has the most best answers. I bet she'd be an informed conversationalist.
  6. Milk and two sugars please.
  7. I'm not a coffee fan; is tea an option? If so, I would have to say that I would be willing to have a nice cuppa with *almost* everyone here. There are a few that so happily stick their fingers in their ears and pretend that infant adoption is all roses and unicorn farts that I'm not sure I could stomach an hour in their presence. But, with the exception of those few, I'd be open to most everyone else.
  8. No. I don't always agree with Randy B and Adore Him who hasn't been here for a while but I would still like to meet them as I respect their views. I have met pro adoption people IRL and will discuss views on the subject as we all have something new to learn.
  9. I don't drink coffee either but the real question is would I meet with them. I am not afraid to meet with those who don't agree with me. That being said, I would have to say that the way I see some of those on here try to beat their point of view across in some very negative fashion would probably keep me from meeting with a lot of them.
  10. Nope. I'd happily sit and have a cuppa with many of the reg's on here, not just the anti's. In fact, I think there's only one I wouldn't wanna sit and have a happy cuppa with atm.
  11. Just because I don't agree with someone on an issue doesn't mean they have nothing intelligent to say. If they ask my opinion in ernest, I will give it, and have, and they've done the same. But I don't usually subscribe to the "us vs. them" good/evil business, because it totally halts discussion. If we all only ever talk to people who mirror our opinions, we can never think of things in a different way, and it just proliferates. That said, there are a couple of folks here who I DO typically agree with...And I've talked to them at length. We may have talked about adoption a little bit, but we actually mostly talked about non-adoption related stuff. So...People are more complex than this one issue. We are all human and have a whole mess of stuff going on in our real lives that has absolutely nothing to do with adoption, and frankly, I enjoy getting to know people. I am passionate about a good many things that seemingly consume a huge part of my life that have nothing at all to do with adoption. So, I can't think of but one or two I wouldn't want to get to know, only because they've displayed overt cruelty repeatedly. I still maintain that people are basically good, and the regulars in this section, agree or disagree, are made of tough stuff, because this isn't your average rainbow-farting feel-good adoption site. All of us have taken a few KO's at one time or another, so no matter where someone sits on their opinion, I respect that they're here.
  12. There are a few here who I generally disagree with that I would love to have coffee with. A better idea would be to polish off a few beers or bottles of wine. I think that would be amazing.
  13. I don't drink coffee, so I wouldn't have coffee but I'd be willing to sit down & talk to someone who disagreed with me, as long as they were civil & didn't yell, insult me, call me names, or attack me. I have friends with different political views & we get along fine.
  14. First, as far as meeting or hanging out IRL, it's a matter of personal preference and anyone is entitled to their socialisation preferences. I don't need to "give equal time to opposing points of view" for socialising, I can hang out with whoever I want to. Second, I don't see it as "pro/anti" or "us/them" although I can see where it appears that way here. That's too petty for me. I think I'm pretty clear and open about my opinions here and I'm willing to explain them further to clarify if asked (nicely). I also expect that people may agree with me on some things and differ on others, that's life. It's ethics and good will or lack of same that I care about. Finally, yes there certainly are some people here who I would not like to meet and it's not because they are "pro-adoption", it's because I don't like them. I find them to be obnoxious. It's that simple. p.s. And Tish's question was intended to lighten it up a bit in here, you know.
  15. Im always open to conversation with people of all opinions and all walks of life.......dissenting opinions make for more interesting conversation. The only people on here who I wouldnt bother sitting down with are the very few who make a point of being as insulting as humanly possible EVERY single time they post. Those who cant or wont respect the right of people to have different opinions are simply not worth my time and energy.
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